---There was a patient at onetime who was dying of cancer. She actually had a tumor where the eye once was. Though, not a patient of Dr. Sweet, the woman wanted to speak to her about something important. Dr. Sweet had trepidation's, but went to the bed despite it all. ---With ALL the woman had to talk about, she spoke of one thing. She, basically, hadn’t spoken to the doctor before this. She leaned in and the woman said, ‘’I want to talk about the food.’’ And, another concern the patient had was if she could get ''eyeglasses for her 'good' eye so that she could read again?'' ---The accompanying realization was the beginning of the doctor realizing that, after-a-time, residents/patients still are most times concerned with things they have control of and have made a certain peace with some of the larger issues that Dr. Sweet thought was the problem. Many times it is the small things that are the problems. Big and small were now issues that were very different animals to both. This is a HUGE point of contention!---I have had much the same experience. And I think that others may relate, also. The priorities change. Staff cannot understand why residents think that such-a-small-issue is the issue…when, clearly, to them, there is so much to deal with. It must be such-and-such. This is HUGE point of contention. I feel that a very basic point of difference comes when a staff person projects what the resident is thinking/feeling. The staff puts his/her own biases right in the way. Be Well.
came upon these great MIGHTY NURSE cartoons a couple of weeks ago. I think they
are very poignant. I hope that you find that they capture a certain segment of
the life of a nurse and enjoy them as much as I do. If you are interested in seeing
more of their merchandise - GOOGLE mighty nurse images. Be Well.
What Needs To Be Heard? ---People ask what kinds of things do people carry with them that needs to be heard? What are the things that folks carry that need to be reckoned with? They are usually negative experiences that happened in childhood that they/we were NOT able to really deal with. Or, it could be anything that gets in the way of expressing ourselves as we want. ---As we see a bird or a bee go from flower to flower we see that we should be able to go from situation to situation with the same type of freedom. BUT…when many here ventured out to go from flower (situation) to flower (situation,) many of us weren’t prepared for what we encountered. Many of us met with adversity and were deflated during the experience. We felt worthless or discouraged and vowed that we would never try that again. Many have lived under the guise that if one doesn’t try at least one doesn’t fail. ---We see the flower to be a good match for the bee and/or bird. Though situations do exist that rival the bird, bee and flower...many do NOT. And...though the situations are there to teach us our lessons, we may find ourselves reeling in the process at times. Eventually, we should end up with the bee, bird and flower situation...but we sometimes find we may have a heap of learning to do along the way before we get there. ---Some are busy telling us the things that we can NOT do. That is when the power of YET comes in handy. Most things that we are told we can NOT do changes very suddenly when we add YET to the statement. If the truth be told we are told something that we can NOT do...YET! Give us some time with it to apply some necessary effort to it and we are now prepared to meet the challenge. ---What needs to be heard is all the negativity and lack of encouragement to turn the curses of those experiences into blessings. Instead of being beaten down completely by all that happened, we pick ourselves up, learn from the experience and plunge ever so vigilantly to our goal into the same line again and again...getting closer and closer to a touchdown. Somehow we are driven to continue. To be encouraged to achieve and accomplish something that one feels has value, can be a wonderful thing. What needs to be heard are all the things that does NOT allow one to experience a freedom to grow and appreciate. If one has never had these things in his/her life, one may not know what I’m even talking about. One realizes that the line that one has been plunging into is made up of ALL the discouragements and negativity that have beaten us down in the first place. ---What Needs To Be Heard - In General - II ---I worked as a counselor in my life and though we each have a unique story unto ourselves…one can see patterns that do emerge. When someone tells his story it doesn’t take very long until he begins to reveal how he sees things. If one listens intently, one quickly gets a sense of the person whose talking. And, generally, eventually one can tell if he/she is on the same page(s) or not. ---If one speaks with someone long enough It doesn’t take long to find his/her anger button. I listen to the kinds of things he/she laughs at and generally get a lot of data as to the type of person he/she is. For example, if someone laughs at others, he probably does a lot of competing and comparing with others. ---If people hold grudges a lot, they are probably still blaming someone for their present situation. People do much better when they take responsibility in their life. Even if they take total responsibility for laughing at the things they laugh at…they will find it reveals much about the kind of person they are. If someone is successful at something, their reaction to his success tells much about them. If they are threatened by it, it is one thing. To be happy because of it...well, that is another. ---And those times in life that we may feel we like or love someone who does NOT feel the same. We feel unloved and rejected. We feel unrequited and unsatisfied...distress to the pit of our stomach and we see no relief in sight. We may realize those unrequited feelings may reflect how our relationship with life has been. Those feelings must be dealt with. ---To make a long story short...1] the things that need to be heard are the things that further the self expression of the individual without hurting others and 2] the confidence to learn that it is better to be who one is in the process and to NOT compete and/or compare oneself with others to see how we are doing. Be Well. A Draft That Be Added To Or Subtracted From At Anytime.
---I’d like to speak of the situation Galileo found himself in many years ago and how it resembles the modern day position of many people. He believed the truth that the earth circled the sun instead of the common belief that the sun circled the earth. People in his day believed that the sun circled the earth AND being written that way in the bible…made it easy for folks to accept that falsehood. Frankly, with the limited sight and instruments, it is very easy to understand why many thought that. ---Galileo built a telescope and began to see a larger version of what most had been referring to and was able to see things that were never seen. He saw something in his new vision that contradicted conventional wisdom and the bible (which was seen by many as the literal word of God.) Galileo was persecuted and punished for stating what he saw. He was called a heretic by the masses who still had a limited vision and believed the conventional wisdom that the sun circled the earth…thinking Galileo was, hence, being wrong. He was called a heretic for holding his beliefs...which were true. He decided not to be a martyr for his cause, as he realized that the truth as he understood it...will come out eventually. A very shrewd move on his part. ---Today, many are in a similar boat that Galileo found himself. There still seem many who hold the belief that making others well somehow doesn't involve making folks well in a holistic manner. They seem more involved with relieving the pain without going to the heart of the matter. There seems a faction of society unconvinced that the negativity of the patient has much to do with the cause of thediscomfort. We live in a very pill-oriented society. We seem to want a medication to address every bad attitude. I think that many folks would be happier if they pursued a GROWTH MINDSET instead of remaining in a FIXED MINDSET. They find themselves held in check by others with a FIXED MINDSET. (Much like the blind leading the blind.) ---Psychologist Abraham Maslow said that our only real rival is our own potential. The FIXED MINDSET is NOT concerned with reaching one's own potential. It is mainly concerned with appearing toreach ourown potential without giving away the fact that we haven't reached it. We become more concerned with saving face than with actual growth. ---A GROWTH MINDSET is much more concerned with actually growing and (by growing) heads naturally in that direction. The cure comes from teaching the residents to express themselves in a civil, caring manner, not dominating others with fear, and by working together and building a society based on caringness, mutual-respect and togetherness. Be Well.